HH
So B"H somehow I was given the right to one piece of luggage, in addition to a carry on, so I took a big box of matza (2 and 1/2 kilo I think) and filled it with about 20 new Legendary Tales so that from Uman they can make their way to English speaking locations. The airport security had a real heyday with it, I told them straight out that it wasn't matza we were dealing with, but something much more powerful - books of Rabbainu! So first they ran the box through some machines, xray I presume, and that just whetted their appetite, and they opened up the box and had all types of discussions over it , and they started examining the books and the stack of paper fliers which have one story printed on it, they called me in, and another guy came in and took another look at my passport, and this went on for some time, all the while I goaded them on, explaining to them that their machines were sensing the utter power of Nanach but couldn't put their finger on it. In any event they got quite a mouthful of Nanach B"H, and eventually my matza box of Rabbainu was freed and given over to be put on the plane.
Na Nach Nachma Nachman MeUman!
So B"H somehow I was given the right to one piece of luggage, in addition to a carry on, so I took a big box of matza (2 and 1/2 kilo I think) and filled it with about 20 new Legendary Tales so that from Uman they can make their way to English speaking locations. The airport security had a real heyday with it, I told them straight out that it wasn't matza we were dealing with, but something much more powerful - books of Rabbainu! So first they ran the box through some machines, xray I presume, and that just whetted their appetite, and they opened up the box and had all types of discussions over it , and they started examining the books and the stack of paper fliers which have one story printed on it, they called me in, and another guy came in and took another look at my passport, and this went on for some time, all the while I goaded them on, explaining to them that their machines were sensing the utter power of Nanach but couldn't put their finger on it. In any event they got quite a mouthful of Nanach B"H, and eventually my matza box of Rabbainu was freed and given over to be put on the plane.
Na Nach Nachma Nachman MeUman!
My Beloved Simcha
ReplyDeleteYou are Mamash a Gevalt!
It's like i was literally just at the airport counter with you, hearing and watching all this.
I send you my love and brochos mai-Eretz Marchakim
Moshe Chaim from R Tzvi's
HH Great to hear from you MCR, thinking more about you recently especially since the English are starting to get more into Nanach B"H.
ReplyDeleteWhen I arrived in Uman somewhat exhausted (on the airplane, I made a considerable giggling fit revolution which was quite successful is disipating the sordid atmosphere which has strong overtones of niuf, R"L, as can be understood from Torah 6), and prayed and went to sleep, when I woke up I saw the matza box right by my side in the window sill, and very groggily I struggled to understand how it got there, because I suddenly didn't have any recollection of taking the box with me from the car. B"H later that day a friend told me that on his way to the mikva he spotted the matza box in middle of the road, and brought it to me, the box took quite a beating, but B"H the books were guarded...
Na Nach Nachma Nachman MeUman!
I also have been thinking about you in recent weeks, and missing you a lot!
ReplyDeleteI tried to leave a comment a week before I left the one above.
"In other news" I read your blogs going back a long time a few weeks ago. Most pieces I mamash get Hano'oh close to if we were sitting together and you were telling me.
I was very delighted by your "Sefer" on Halochos of someone going to do an Aveirah.
I discussed it be'arichus with both my Breslov friends (Lazer Greenhouse etc) and some Kollel friends.
It took the Kollel olom a long time to get their heads around it, they couldn't be tofeis the whole concept, that you were in no way promoting or condoning Aveiros - the opposite in fact. But once they did grasp that, we had some very good discussion, about lots of different things that you wrote there, with some chiddushim.
On the whole inyan, I had a tzad (at least for me personally) that maybe better to do an Aveiroh without any holding back, and then to at least "know" afterwards with ones whole being that one has sinned "completely", and now to do Mitzvos with the same pure motivation - once we try to be doing "some" Halocho in the middle of the Aveiroh, maybe my Mitzvos will also be more mixed motivations... according to that I had another way of maybe understanding the "fat on the beard" statement from the Rebbe... If I had certainty about what the Rebbe meant, I hope I'd put aside my own opinion.
Lazer and most others were anyway metzaded with you, also from what the Rebbe said about "Your Aveiros wont have Hands or Feet".
My personal take from on the whole Parsha is that I now have 2 tzedodim, one of which is not to think about Halocho at all, the other is the opposite. So I'm hoping that when a Sha'as Aveiroh comes, I'll tell it, "Please go away, because you're getting me into a complicated Sha'aloh which I don't want to be forced to decide on, come back when I've come to a maskonoh... You came to offer me pleasure, but instead you're giving me a headache!"
:)
Also, I thought about you again last night, our former mutual Rosh Yeshiva made a big FundRaising Dinner in our area, I came very late kedarki, and the guards wouldn't let me in because nobody else was coming in then, and I didn't have my invitation on me! I understood that their Shitah is now, you have to be on our list to even be allowed to GIVE money to us!
:)
I don't have your direct contact details ... I am misga'ageiah to hear your voice. If you know how I can email you directly, please let me know.
Ashrecha that you were Zoche to be there for Rosh Chodesh Nissan!
With my love
MC
HH just like the blog my email is at gmail.
ReplyDeleteYour tzaddik about doing the avaira completeley GF, I don't see as tenable whatsoever, besides for the no hands and feet, GF a person could utterly cut himself off (even though according to chabad any avaira is like that.... This also brings to mind what Rabbainu said that some people work their whole life to utterly have no conscience, and when they are finally reaching achievement they die...).
Not sure what version you had, every so often I add to it and its coming along nicely, also much more chizuking in the last second before...
ילבש שחורים,
Started to think of giving a pshat that it means to go to sleep even in such a state of no shema, thus having the body enclothed in black and prone to keri...
Once the RY stayed literally next door to me when I was in Passaic NJ and I didn't see him. No loss there.
NNNNM
HH the main point is that every degree of the avaira is forbidden, and even if an allowance can be found, only the very most bare squeeze would be plausible, and an argument of learning from avaira to mitzva has no bearing on this whatsoever and would not be grounds to permit any degree of avaira, just a persons overwhelmed state...
ReplyDeleteNNNNM
It's not that exactly. The point is very subtle and hard to express. Not saying for a second to ever do more than the Yetzer Hora is pushing for, and Kal veChomer not to plan to do an Aveiroh lechatchila.
ReplyDeleteIt may be that we're talking about different angles and not disagreeing.
Just have tzad that maybe better to think as follows:
(Introduction: Learning the "halochos" of an Aveiroh is comparable to learning Mussar, in the hope that in a calm, pre-Nissayon state, one can practice and internalise behaviour / thought paths which will become ingrained enough to even be in place during a time of Nisayon)
That Nekuda I have a tzad, (only a tzad!) that it may be misguided effort, let the Aveirah stand or fall based on how much "Yetzer HaTov" energy one can summon at the time + any Eitzos that are solely aimed at NOT doing the Aveirah at all.
Whilst going down the road of "in advance", preparing myself with mental pathways along the lines of "even if i can't resist the Aveiroh, I'm going to do it in this + this oifon" may also mean I add a level of falseness to a Taivoh.
On similar lines, I think it much less bad that someone looks at something straight out Ossur on the internet - when a person's coming from a place of sadness and wants any feeling of (easy) pleasure they can find (and knows 100% that they are doing an Aveiroh) - than to explore the web for "loshon hora", with a mindset that yes, it's not leChatchila, it's not the best use of my time, but on the other hand I'm feeling bored / empty, and in a way its "important to know these things" etc, and I'm guarding my eyes very carefully from all images etc. I think the second person is worse, partly because there's a certain inner dishonesty together with what may from some angles appear a smaller sin. I know this paragraph on the surface doesnt directly have to do with what we're talking about, but the idea behind it feels similar to me. (In my humble understanding, it is the difference between what the Nochosh WANTED Chava to do (a bitter act , based on kabolas loshon hora and anger at Hashem) and what she actually did do (refused to listen to him, and instead did an Aveiroh of Ta'avoh only, when she couldn't throw off his loshon hora any other way) which is why she answered Hashem, that the Nochosh "tempted me" ie to believe and act on loshon hora about You, but I did not listen, instead "I ate", a pure act of Ta'avoh instead)
Anyway I've drifted off topic. Even as I read back what I've written I don't know if it will make sense to you.
Bli neder will email you soon!
Ashrecha
MC
HH it seems to me that you are taking issue with the Nefesh Hachaim who mocks the chassis who didn't stop doing what was wrong because someone was watching, insisting that he must stop only from his own fear of Heaven. Even assuming the Nefesh Hachaim is wrong on this, there is still a far way from such a thing to an initiative to do an avaira fully. However I do bring from Rabbi Nussun that limafraya one could see how an avaira one did brought him afterwards to a higher truth, and that avaira might just have been a completely immersed one. NNNNM
ReplyDeleteAfter I wrote last night I realised a few things:
ReplyDelete1. I was implying that to look at things differently to me is being like the Nochosh - that was not what I meant to convey. Apologies for any any lack of love or Kovod implied!
2. How do you manage to write so much deep Torah - even in English - and still make yourself clear? I'm struggling even on one point! (Except it just struck me that maybe you're thinking even deeper Torah than is written, and you're also struggling!
I'm definitely not arguing with Nefesh HaChayim - just maybe not expressing myself well.
Much Love!
MC
HH there's no fear of arguing against the Nefesh Hachaim who openly goes against the Arizal, and even on this point he says that he thinks that the whole entire import of the story in Kedushin of RAV Amram was to prove this line of thought wrong, which is astounding for him to say, for surely he knew very well that every gemura has many many facets.... Once, somewhere I think I very clearly supported the chussids side. Too much for me now to get into. Maybe in the future.
ReplyDeleteNNNNM
ב"ה עכשיו מצאתי את זה בספר שיח שרפי קודש, חלק ב' אות לח:
ReplyDeleteאָמַר רַבֵּנוּ: "אוֹמְרִים הָעוֹלָם בְּדֶרֶךְ הֲלָצָה: אֶחָד, שֶׁאוֹכֵל חֲזִיר לְכָל הַפָּחוֹת, שֶׁיִּזַּל שׁוּמָן הַחֲזִיר עַל זְקָנוֹ... וַאֲנִי אוֹמֵר, שֶׁלְּכָל הַפָּחוֹת לֹא יִזַּל עַל הַזָּקָן... "דִּי וֶועלְט זָאגְט אַז אֵיינֶער עֶסְט שׁוֹין חֲזִיר זָאל אִים חָאטְשׁ רִינֶען אוֹיף דִּי בָּארְד... אוּן אִיךְ זָאג, זָאל חָאטְשׁ נִישְׁט רִינֶען אוֹיף דִּי בָּארְד..." כְּאוֹמֵר, שֶׁהָעוֹלָם אוֹמְרִים שֶׁזֶּה הָאָדָם שֶׁעוֹשֶׂה רַע, אַל יִהְיֶה צָבוּעַ וְיַסְתִּיר מַעֲשָׂיו, אֶלָּא טוֹב שֶׁיְגַלֶּה וְיִרְאוּ הַכֹּל אֶת נִכְלוּתוֹ, וַאֲנִי אוֹמֵר שֶׁלְּכָל הַפָּחוֹת יִתְבַּיֵּשׁ בְּמַעֲשָׂיו הַמְגֻנִּים, וְלֹא יְגַלֶּה מַעֲשָׂיו בָּרַבִּים. וְיֵשׁ אוֹמְרִים, שֶׁכַּוָּנַת הַדְּבָרִים הוּא, שֶׁכָּל מַה שֶּׁמּוֹנֵעַ הָאָדָם עַצְמוֹ מִלַּעֲשׂוֹת רַע בְּעֵת חֶטְאוֹ אֲפִלּוּ מְעַט זֶה גַּם הוּא טוֹב. וְזֶהוּ שֶׁאָמַר שֶׁלְּכָל הַפָּחוֹת לֹא יִזַּל מִשּׁוּמְנוֹ עַל זְקָנוֹ.
נ נח נחמ נחמן מאומן
Amazing - the 2 approaches being discussed by us (and with my friends), are mamash dependent on those 2 ways of understanding what the Rebbe meant about the fat!
ReplyDeleteMuch love
MC
HH
ReplyDeleteJust last night I came across a sugya in Sanhedrin bottom of 26b about people that do sins but have good intentions or regrets, or take upon themselves punishment. There is definite hierarchy, however it can be argued that that is just in regard to a persons status as being honest and reliable. Even still ultimately it proves the obvious that there is a hierarchy, and one should always strive to diminish the extent and degree of any sin that G-f he falls to.
Na Nach Nachma Nachman MeUman!