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Likutay Tefilos 34
A Collection of Prayers
Prayer 34
“My mouth will
speak wisdoms, and the ruminations of my heart - comprehensions (Psalms 49:4).”
“G-d hear my prayer listen to the words of my mouth (Psalms 54:4),” “The offerings
of my mouth please find favorable (now) and Your statutes teach me (Psalms
119:108).” “Listen Hashem to my prayer and hear (-accept) the call of my
entreaties (Psalms 86:6).” “Hear Hashem the call of my entreaties when I cry
out to You, when I lift my hands up to Your holy sanctuary (Psalms 28:2).” “Do
not incline my heart to a bad thing, to connive (/perform) evil schemes with
personages perpetrators of iniquity, and let me not break bread in their luscious
feasts (Psalms 141:4).” “A crooked heart should turn away from me[1], evil[2], I
shall not know (Psalms 101:4).” “Incline my heart to Your testimonies and not
to profiting (Psalms 119:36).” “A pure heart create for me G-d, and a correct[3]
spirit make/renew inside me (Psalms 51:12).” Help me Master of the World[4],
Master of the entire universe[5], that
I should merit to attach my heart to the words of my mouth, so that my heart
will be (-sincerely feel) as (the words of) my mouth, and save me in Your
abundant mercies so that I do not speak before You deceitful words[6], and
my heart should not be incongruous from the words of my mouth, and I should
merit to pour out my words (-what is on my mind), and my prayer, and my
entreaty, and my supplication before You with a fully articulated mouth and a
whole heart, to the extent that my heart should connect to the words of my
mouth in my entreaties and in my supplications, and be with me always, and (You
should) save me, and help me, and merit me to express all my words (-what is on
my mind) before You always with all (my) heart, and all that is with (-on) my
heart I will converse before You always, truthfully and with a whole heart, and
I should merit to do a very great deal of hisbodidus and conversing between me
and my Maker, until there will be revealed and illuminated the holy point which
is rooted in me which is is the aspect of the dominion of the tzadik, as it is
written (Isaiah 60:21), “And Your nation, they are all tzadikim.” And this holy
point will radiate and rule through the words of my mouth in prayers, and
entreaties, and supplications. And I should merit to bind my heart to this holy
point with a durable and strong attachment, to the extent that this holy point
will illuminate from my mouth to my heart, until there will be revealed the
light of holy love for Hashem Yisburach which is rooted in me, and through this
there will be nullified and there will fall away from my heart the derision of
the heart, foreskin of the heart, brokenness of the heart, which are all the
bad desires, and bad traits, and bad thoughts, and improper musings, and
confusions which reign on my heart, to the extent that my entire heart is
broken, and destroyed, and very, very messed up on account of these abundant
ignominies. And all of them should be nullified from me completely through the
light of the holy point which is in me, that You should merit me that it should
be revealed and illuminate from my mouth to my heart, through the words of the
entreaties, and supplications, and the arousal for You and Your devotion, that
I should merit to say them truthfully and with a whole heart, from the depth of
the heart, with real truth.
Please Hashem, abundantly
Merciful One, He Who has compassion on the poor, Who hears the moaning of the
destitute, Who sees the humiliation of the humiliated, Who desires the
repentance of the wicked and doesn’t desire their death[7], “You
know my disgrace, and my shame, and my mortification, before You are all my
adversaries (Psalms 69:20).” “Contemptuous derision broke my heart and I am very
debilitated, and I hope for some acknowledgment of empathy[8]
and/but there is none, and for consolers and/but I didn’t find (anyone) (Psalms
69:21).” “Behold I am before You (like a vessel) full of shame and mortification[9],”
full of derisions and disgraces, “What can I say, what can I speak, and what
justification can I offer?[10] Have
mercy and compassion on me, “Remove the derision of my [sin] from which I fear
[retribution] because Your statutes are for betterment (Psalms 119:39).” Merit
me to do return in true complete repentance before You. Merit me to express my
words (-what is on my mind) before You truly and wholeheartedly, in such a way
that I can arouse the good point within me, and it will radiate in me from my
mouth to my heart, in such a way that I will merit to rectify my very defected
heart. And I should merit to remove and nullify from my heart all the derisions
of the heart, and all the foreskins of the heart, and all the crookedness that
is in my heart, because my heart is full of very evil crookedness, without
measure, and quantification, and number. “The heart is most perverse and it is
extremely sick, who can fathom it? And You[11]
Hashem probe the heart and test the kidneys[12] (Jeremiah
17:9-10),” heal my brokenness and bandage my soul’s very numerous ailments,
have mercy and compassion on me Master of the World, because You know the evil
of my heart, and the evil perversion which took hold and blended into my heart,
to the extent that my entire heart is full of very, very many (improper)
musings, and (bodily) desires, and confusions without measure, and
quantification, and number, to the extent that it is difficult for me to rest
and relax for one hour, because at all times and hours the (bodily) desires and
confusions pursue (after) me, and deride and break my heart, to the extent that
I don’t know any way, or path, or aitzuh (recourse, advice, remedy), or scheme
how to escape them, and even what still does sparkle for me some flickering of
good aitzoas (-recourse, remedies, advice), I don’t fulfill them due to the
utter magnitude of my discouragement, and the dispersion of the heart and the
soul.
Master of the
World, it is very bitter for me, You know my enormous bitterness, You know my
derision and the bad temperament of my heart in all its aspects, in all its
details and specifics, and there is no one who can heal me, just You alone
Hashem my G-d and the G-d of my fathers, in/with Your true kindnesses alone,
with unconditional kindness alone, even though I don’t merit to speak even
these words truthfully, as You know, because they deride me with all types of
derision and shaming, “All who see me scorn me, they cluck with their lips[13],
they shake their head (Psalms 22:8).” “The whole day my mortification is before
me, and the shame of my face covers me. From the call of the mocking haranguer
and blasphemer, from before the enemy and the avenger (Psalms 44:16-17).” And
at all times and every moment my mind and heart are laced with all types of
derision and disparagement. And it doesn’t stop with what they deride me, and
break my heart with all types of bad desires, and vices, and bad and disgusting
musings, also, even in the midst of this when I want to raise my eyes a little
to You, and to utter[14] my
words for Your mercies and Your benevolences, all the while my heart is full of
self-interest, and great confusions, and haughty spirit, through which my
prayer is despised by You G-d forbid, as it is written (Proverbs 16:5), “It is
an abomination to Hashem all haughty of heart.” And now what can I do and what
can I carry out, to where can I run for help? Look at my affliction/poverty for
many are my pains and the hardships of my heart. However, even still I hope and
await for Your many mercies and for Your hidden[15]
kindnesses, because You know what is hidden in my heart and the very root of my
good point, that in the real truth I have a root (of a) good, and holy, and
pure point, because I am from the progeny of the House of Israel, and my soul
is rooted in the soul of the true tzadik who is the soul of the aggregate soul
of the Children of Israel. Hence, in the real truth, in the immanent root of my
good point, I scream to You in truth and with a complete heart, that You have
compassion on me, and mercy on me, and benevolently grant me from the
treasure-house of matnas cheenum (-ex gratia/unconditional gifting)[16], and
help me to remove from myself the foreskin of my heart, and the brokenness of
my heart, and the derision of my heart. And I should merit to really truly
incline my heart to You, and to break, and to nullify from my heart all the bad
desires, and bad traits, and crookedness of the heart, and evil (temperament)
of the heart. And return me in complete repentance before You, truthfully and
wholeheartedly, and I should merit quickly/soon to a pure heart, to a good
heart, to a holy heart, to a wholesome heart, as is Your good desire.
And in this
vein I have come before You Hashem my G-d and the G-d of my fathers, Ruler over
everything, (that) You created Your world with Your good will, for Your nation
Israel, in order that Israel would receive the Torah, and through this they
would merit to rule over You so to speak, as it is written (Samuel 2:23:3 as
interpreted by the Talmud in Moed Kuttun 16b), “the tzadik rules over [the fear
of][17] G-d,”
and it is written (Psalms 114:2), “Israel His ruler.” Therefore to You I will
turn and it is You I beseech, before You I will entreat, before You I will
prostrate in keeduh (-upon one’s face), with kreyuh (-of the knees), with
hishtachavuyuh (-outspreading of the hands and feet, until one is flat out on
the ground)[18],
with bowed head, with humbled enterprisingness, with fright, with fear, with
trembling and sweat, with a heart broken, and crushed, and woeful, and wretched,
“pushed around and deplorable/haggard/hair torn out (Isaiah 18:2).” Rock of
Israel and his Holy One[19],
redeemer of Israel, have mercy on us for the sake of Your name, and merit us
with Your enormous kindnesses to draw close and to bind (ourselves) to the true
tzadikim who are the root of the general aggregate of the souls of Israel. And
(You) should merit me to speak with them face to face (-“mouth to mouth
(Numbers 12:8)”), and to hear from their holy mouths holy words, and they
should speak upon (-to) my heart words that are in consonance with the heart,
and I should merit to bind my heart to the holy words of their mouth, to their
holy point, and their holy point of their mouths should rule and radiate to my
heart, and through this all the derisions of the heart, and all the foreskin of
the heart, and all the perversion of the heart will be nullified from my heart,
and my heart will be straight with Hashem always.
And in this vein,
[You] should merit me to speak with Israel Your holy nation at large, about
Torah, and worship, and fear of Heaven, until I merit to receive beneficial
illumination and arousal for Hashem Yisburach from all the (unique) holy points
that are in each and every single one of Israel, what there is not in his
friend. And we should merit that there will be love and great peace between all
of Israel Your nation, and each and every one will speak with his friend about
fear of Heaven, until all of us, You nation the House of Israel, will be
integrated one another with love, and brotherhood, and comradery, and every one
will receive from his friend arousal for Hashem Yisburach from the holy point
that his friend has more than him, and we should receive one from another, and
we should arouse each other to Your worship and Your Torah in absolute truth.
And [You should]
merit me in Your abundant mercies, myself, and my children, and children’s
children, and your entire nation the House of Israel, that we should merit,
each and every one, to speak between himself and his Maker, and we should
arouse our hearts to (have) fear of Heaven, and we should merit always to
express our words (-what is on our minds) before You every single day in the
spoken language, with mercy evoking great pleaful entreating, and with words of
appeasement and plentiful mollification, and with solid/correct argumentation
and justifications, and with truly great arousal, and with endearing and
touching words, until we merit to bind our hearts to the hold point within us,
which is the aspect of the domination of the tzadik. And we should merit to supplicate
copiously before You, and to abound profusely every single day in “seechuh
<conversing>” which is tifeeluh <prayer> (Avoaduh Zuruh 7b),
and we should merit to say before You every single day many, many entreaties,
and requests, and confessions, and prayers, and implorings, and we should
strengthen and embolden ourselves with prayer and entreaties with all (our) might
and forces. And we should not give You respite until You are gracious to us, we
will call to You until You answer us, until we arouse Your true mercies upon
us, and we merit to be victorious over You with our prayers, and our
entreaties, and our conversing, that You return Your countenance to us and You have
mercy on us, and You return us in true complete repentance before You with complete
heart and soul. And You should merit us that all these three holy points
radiate in us, (the three being-) the radiance of the holy point of the true
tzadik of the generation, and the radiance of the holy point of Your nation
Israel in general, each one to his friend, that each one will illuminate in his
friend the radiance of the holy point that he has in him what his friend doesn’t
(have in him), and the radiance of the holy point of each one in himself, that
each and every single one will receive from himself from the holy point that he
has in himself, that it should illuminate from is mouth to his heart through speaking
between himself and his Creator with arousal of the heart, in prayer, and
conversing (with Gd), and entreaty, and supplication with truth and wholeheartedness,
and through all this we should merit that the radiance of the tzadik who is the
foundation of the world (Proverbs 10:25) will radiate in our hearts, and we should
merit that our hearts will be truly connected with a strong and durable bond
for all eternity to the light of these three holy points which is where the
light of the love and the kindness is shoaruh (presides-pervades-fluxes),
until through this there will be nullified
all the denigrations which are shoareh (preside-pervade-flux) on the
heart which are called foreskin of the heart, breakage of the heart, which are
all the bad desires and bad thoughts, and I should merit to truly purify my
heart from all crookedness of the heart, and from all types of heresy of the
heart, and from all evil of the heart. And (You should) help me to break and to
nullify all the bad desires, and all the bad thoughts, and all types of bad
musings, and all types of confusions, and all types of dregs and turbidity of
the heart, until I merit to a pure heart, to a holy heart, to a good heart, to
a straight heart, in the utmost truth, as is Your will and as is the will of
the true tzadikim. And my heart should be straight with Hashem always, until I
merit to be attached (divaikus) to You, and to be included in Your good desire.
And with Your great love cover over all our (willful) sins, as it is written
(Proverbs 10:12), “and over all (willful) sins) love covers.” And pardon, and
forgive, and atone us for all our sins, erring, and (willful) sins, and gather
away our denigrations, and from now (on) be to our aid that we should not ever sin
anymore, neither unintentionally nor intentionally, neither by coercion nor willfully,
and save us from all types of defects that are in the world, and we should
merit to be truly as Your good will.
And merit me to
sanctify my mouth with holy speech, and help me rectify all the defects which I
defected with my mouth, until I merit that my mouth will be fill with the
blessing of Hashem[20], and
my mouth should be filled with Your praise[21]. And
my vessels of shefa (provisions and bounty), which are the words of my mouth,
should be with great completeness, until I merit to always draw shefa (provisions,
bounty) of goodness, and blessings, and mercy, and life, and peace through the
words of my mouth. And (You should) always listen to our prayers, and abnegate
Your will before our will, so that can decree with our words and it will be
enacted[22], and
there should be a fulfillment of the verse which writes, “I am Hashem your Gd
who took you up from the Land of Egypt, widen (-express and elaborate with)
your mouth and I will fill it (Psalms 81:11).” And (You should) help us with
Your mercies that we merit quickly to true holiness of the bris (-circumcision,
covenant), and we merit to rectify all types of defects of the bris that we
defected until now. And the merit of Josef the tzadik who withstood the test,
and the merit of the true tzadikim who withstood many countless tests, and they
subjugated their (bad) inclinations (yetzer) for the sake of Your name, should
protect us. And in their merit and their power (You should) help me from now
(on), Hashem my Gd and the the Gd of my fathers, that I should merit also to subjugate
my inclination and my desire. And (You should) save me with Your mercies from
all types of defects of the bris that are in the world, so that I shall not be embarrassed,
and I will not blunder in any pitfall or bad thought whatsoever from now on forever,
and (You should) merit me quickly to true and complete rectification of the
bris as is Your good will, and I should merit to rectify consummately the bris
(-covenant) of the tongue and the bris (-covenant, circumcision) of the pudendum.
And (You should) graciously endow us from Yourself, holy wisdom, and understanding,
and realization of knowledge, and I should merit to learn and to teach (Torah)
with great diligence, and to fulfill all the words of Your Torah with love.
Have pity and be gracious with us, and have mercy on us, and fill all our
wishes with mercy, be gracious with us, and answer us, and listen to our prayers,
because You listen to the prayers of every mouth of Your nation Israel with
mercy, blessed are You Who listens to prayer.
“Yihi-yoo
lirutzoan <may they be pleasing – arousing the Divine Will> imray fee
<the words of my mouth> vihegyoan leebee <and the expressions of my
heart> lifunechuh <before You> Hashem tzooree <my Rock/Maker>
vigoa-allee <and my Redeemer> (Psalms 19:15).”
Na Nach Nachma
Nachman MayUman!
[1] This
can refer to others who have a crooked heart, that they should stay away
(Metzudos Duvid), or it can refer to one’s own heart, that all crookedness
should be removed from it (Targum).
[2] The
Targum renders this as the evil inclination. Rashi interprets this, not to like
or be familiar with anything bad.
[3]
Aligned/intent in the fear of Heaven – Targum.
[4]
Hebrew: Reeboanoa Shel Oalum.
[5]
Translated from the Aramaic: Muruh di-almuh kooluh.
[6] The
Hebrew word for “words” here is “sifsay,” literally means lips, expression of
the lips, attributing deceit to the lips, because the lips are divided, and
prone to harboring and eliciting two different intents and messages, as opposed
to the tongue which is one.
[7]
Ezekiel 33:11.
[8]
Nodding of the head.
[9]
Prayer of Ruvuh brought down in Brachos 17a, and from there I added the
parenthesis.
[10]
Based on Genesis 44:16 and the long Tachanun of Mondays and Thursdays.
[11] In
the verse it is: “I Hashem….”
[12] The
kidneys are a source of wisdom.
[13] This
seems to be the interpretation of the Targum, alternatively, it can be
translated as: they open with (degrading) language, or: they purse their lip,
or: they negate with their lip/language.
[14]
Literally to chirp, litzafzaif, denotes any sort of expression and utterance no
matter how incomplete, broken, garbled, or mumbled.
[15]
Ginuzim – cached, stored secretly.
[16] The
concept of matnas chinum is already brought down in Rashi in the beginning of
the Torah Portion of Vu-eschanan (Deuteronomy 3:23), that Moses asked G-d to
grant him ex gratia entry into Israel. Rabbainu revealed great secrets of this
construct in Likutay Moharan, volume 2, Torah-teaching 78.
[17] The
parenthesis were added because according to this interpretation of the verse
these words are provided in a kind of euphemism, that it is only the attribute
of the fear of G-d which is being ruled over. Even according to the Talmud’s
interpretation there are other possible ways of explaining these words, but
that must suffice here.
[18]
Really the kreyuh comes before the keeduh, see Brachos 34a and Rambam, Prayer
5:1.
[19]
Isaiah 49:7 – Redeemer of Israel, his Holy One.
[20]
Deuteronomy 33:23.
[21]
Psalms 71:8.
[22] Based
on Job 22:28.
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