Letter 9
BH, 11 Eyar 718 (Thursday, 1 May, 1958). Tiberius
He who I love as my own soul, Mr. Z. Shazar, Shalom and true life.
I have already written that I believe and hope, that because of the
wondrous Providence that took place on Chol Hamoed Pesach (-intermediary days
of Passover), he will have an advantage and great blessing in the endeavor of
drawing. However, concurrent with this, I find myself obligated to reveal to
his ears the truth which is in my heart, that in the matter of our endeavor, I
am completely free of all types of materialistic ulterior self-interest for
money and honor and the likes, Heaven forbid, just "for Hashem alone
(Exodus 22:19)." And I am confident, and I rely upon the elevated level of
his wisdom, that he understands and knows this matter with complete clarity by
his own respectable self. Hashem Yisburach knows and is witness, that I am
ready and prepared to sacrifice my life, and my money, and everything I have
for the sake of this cause, to draw a soul of Israel close to Hashem Yisburach,
or in any event, to instill in him some thought of repentance, even for only
one second!
Rabbainu o.b.m. said (Avunehu Barzel, Words and Stories of Rabbainu
o.b.m. 26, also brought down in Siach Sarfay Kodesh 1-518):
a.
Dus
<the> gadlus <haughtiness> hub ich <I have> shoyn
<already> foon aych tzoobruchen <broken from you – in the Hebrew this
was translated, "the haughtiness that is in you, I have already
broken>.
b.
Ayn
avairu <a sin> vet <will> aych krenkin <cause you suffering>,
es <it> vet <will> aych shoyn nit bakumen <already not be
gratifying>. Afeeloo <even if> eer <you> vet <will> tun
<do (a sin)> vet dus zayn <it will be> un hant <without
hands> oon <and> un <without> feess <feet>.
c.
Miforsumim
<renown> shel <of> shekehr <falsehood – i.e. prestigious rabbis
who are unworthy of their fame, and are thus frauds> vet eer ziyehr
bifnayhem nit un kiken <you will not look upon their faces>, eer
<you> hut <have> shoyn <already> farzicht <tasted>
oongarishen <Hungarian> vine <wine>.
Moharna"t
(acronym for: Our Teacher HaRav <The Rabbi> Nussun) asked Rabbainu
za.tza.l. why he conceals himself (-his greatness) from before the Rav of
Berdichev. And he replied, "To draw close to me, he cannot, except if he
kindles the pipe for me, and this is not possible!"
Even if a
person did what did, and sinned what he sinned, also then Hashem Yisburach
constricts Himself from no limit and no end (-infinity), and conveys hints to
him that he should draw close Him, with courses of different events which He
brings about for all of this from His sublime mysteries, because He, blessed
He, devises schemes so that no reject will be rejected from Him (Samuel
2:14:14). However all these allusions of His, and all His calling to us is
through the true tzadik, that we return to Him from any place which may be –
from all types of impediments, and incentives, and crookedness of the heart,
from all types of uprising of the kleepu (-husk of impurity) of Amulaik which
rises over a person, and every place his mind and his heart strayed and erred.
The very point
of the innermost inside of the heart of every single one of Israel – abundant
and fierce waters cannot extinguish it (Song of Songs 8:7), even if there
transpires over him what transpires, even though the bal duvur (-litigator-evil
inclination-Satan) intensifies severely, and just about incinerates him
completely, even still, it is forbidden for him to despair of himself, just, it
is necessary to glean and to search for some good points from the midst of the
multitude of sins which he was errant in them, and through this he will merit
to return to Hashem Yisburach in truth (Likutay Moharan, Torah 282 –
"Azamru").
These garments
of feces that every person has, as long as he did not rectify his sins, and
particularly he who got filthy the way he got filthy, may the Merciful One save
us, which through this the obstructions and partition are aroused and intensify
upon him every time, and they spread out before him and are very extremely
curtailing, like an actual river, and from there come all the falls and
alienation of many people from Hashem Yisburach, because even if one arouses
some times to return to Hashem Yisburach, immediately the garments of feces
spread out against him, and they do not allow him to draw close, and so it is
every time, and over this David screamed (Psalms 69:3), "I drowned in the
slimy deep bog and there is no foothold etc.," "(verse 15) save me
from mud so that I don't drown etc.," and the essential rectification for
this is …
[the end of this letter is missing].
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